"Offal".."Awful??".."No..OFFAL."

So it was late Saturday night. It had been a crazy long day and I was exhausted. After getting everything that my day required finished up, and all preparations for our crazy Sundays done, I collapsed onto our bed and snuggled up with the love of my life.

We talked about my day and the struggles I had had to not dwell on negative thoughts and mental predictions...when suddenly, I realized I was talking to myself, lol.

The tip off?

My poor hubster started snoring softly...midsentence. He was sooooo exhausted, as only a Waffle House Wife can understand, haha. (and any other wife whose husband's job is physically and mentally demanding for lonnnnng hours)

As understanding as I was, to be honest, I was little disappointed. There was so much I wanted to tell him...to share with him, but I also knew how incredibly worn out he was. He would've absolutely tried his darnedest to stay away and talk to me if I would've awakened him-because he's wonderful like that-but I didn't want to wake him just so I could unload my day on him...But I knew that I prolly wouldn't get the chance to talk to him like this again until late the next night.

SO! Midsentence I switched conversation partners and here is how it went:

"...and so I'll just tell You about it...even though You already know. But it makes me feel better to talk about it."

He replied, "Okay. I love to hear your voice. And yes, I do know, but tell me again."

So I did.

I could feel His arms encircle me as He listened to my heart...and just like when my physical lover wraps me in his arms...I grew peaceful in the safety of the Great Lover's arms and got quite drowsy...well, I'll be honest...I got slap drunk with sleepiness. Now I was the one struggling to stay awake, haha.

Just about the time I was drifting off to sleep, scriptures that I had read earlier in Leviticus(YES! OUT OF EXODUS!) flitted across my mind. I mean they literally floated through my conciousness...it was dream-like. I could see them typed out, swirling like smoke, all mixing together and there was one phrase in bold type that they had in common.

"an aroma pleasing to the Lord..."

I was sooooo comfy...mumbling about aromas and incense...snuggling down deeper into my pillow and into His arms.

"Come see..." He whispered.

"mmm...?" Never opening my eyes.

"Come see...I want to show you something."

"mmhmm...but I'm so tired..."

"I know."

"Can I go to sleep and let's about it in the morning?"

"Yes, you can."

Even in my sleep-drunk state I could feel His longing to talk with me....much like I had felt earlier when I realized my own sweet husband was drifting away into the same realm that was claiming my conciousness now.

My heart started to hurt, but was equally overwhelmed by love for this God that wants so desperately to be with His children..to share his heart... to talk about nothing...to just BE with us...

So I got up, carefully so as not to disturb the sleeping hubster, tip-toed past the Bug's open door, grabbed my Bible off the high counter, snuck back to the bedroom, quietly clicked on the lamp, gingerly crawled back into bed and snuggled down into my blankets and pillows as I opened up to the beginning chapters of Leviticus.

Before I get into what He showed me, let me say that, to many, Leviticus can be a bit overwhelming and tedious. But if you can look at it from the view point of "Show me why this detail was so important to You" or "Show me what I've never seen before" or in MY case "What did You want to show me?" rather than "Dear GOD this is EXHAUSTING", you might just get something so deep that you will drown in revelation and enlightening....

Yeah.

That happened to me.

That night.

As I began to re-read the first chapters, the words that I had seen in my mind earlier began to unfold before me...

And the conversation continued:

"Okay, so the sacrifices were a pleasing aroma to You.." I yawned, "...I get that. Sweet incense to You. I.....kinda already knew that..."

I could feel Him chuckle.

"Look harder. Read it again."

"..Leviticus 1:2 'Speak to the Israelites and say to them: 'when any of you brings an offering to the Lord, bring as your offering and animal from either heard or flock....' "

"Okay...so it was an animal offering. Got that...Still not understanding..."

"Read on."

So I did. 

"Leviticus 1:6-9 '⁶ You are to skin the burnt offering and cut it into pieces. ⁷ The sons of Aaron the priest are to put fire on the altar and arrange wood on the fire. ⁸ Then Aaron’s sons the priests shall arrange the pieces, including the head and the fat, on the wood that is burning on the altar. ⁹ You are to wash the inner parts and the legs with water, and the priest is to burn all of it on the altar. It is a burnt offering, a food offering, an aroma pleasing to the Lord.' "

The lightbulb of my 'revelation lamp' started flickering

and I began to get a little excited.

I was NOT sleepy anymore, haha.

"So it was meat on the altar....cooking meat...?"

"Yes."

"So it was like a grill and the meat was cooking on the grill and it smelled delicious...?"

"Yes."

I got more excited and my questions turned into statements.

"And it was an 'aroma pleasing to You'."

"Yes."

"And it made you hungry."

"Yes." He was chuckling at my excitement, lol.

"And you wanted to be CLOSE to that smell...just like when we smell a grill, we say 'Man! We need to go visit them..' "

"Yes."

"And You came and CONSUMED it!!"

"Haha, yes."

"And its pleasing, not just to You, but to EVERYONE in the near vacinity that can smell it! And...THEY want to come near TOO!! OH WOW!! THAT'S CRAZY!!!"

I must have been bouncing in the bed, haha, because Shane stirred at that point, yawned and groggily asked me what I was doing...

"Talking to Him."

He cracked a sleepy eye, "At 2:30 in the morning??"

I shrugged and said, "He said He wanted to show me something..." I grinned, "Its really good...wanna hear it??"

"mmhmm..." annnd he was off to the land of Nod again, lol.

Then the Uncreated One spoke again.

"Offal."

I made a confused face. "Awful...?"

"No...Offal."

"Huh?...Like...poop??"

"Read."

Okayyyy....?

Leviticus 4:11-12 "¹¹ But the hide of the bull and all its flesh, as well as the head and legs, the inner parts and the offal  — ¹² that is, all the rest of the bull—he must take outside the camp to a place ceremonially clean, where the ashes are thrown, and burn it there in a wood fire on the ash heap. "

"What do you see?"

"They removed the poop before they burned it?"

"Yes...Does burning offal smell good?"

I grimmaced, "Ew."

"Yes. I feel that way too."

The revelation lightbulb started flickering again...

"So when the offal wasn't removed, it would repel You rather than draw You..?"

"Yes."

"And it would repel others...which was why it had to be removed and taken out of the camp..."

"Yes."

"So....our offerings aren't incense at all...not the sweet perfumed smoke...our PRAYERS are incense...like in Revelation.."

He was silent..letting me process.

"And...when our offerings are 'properly prepared', it makes You draw near to us...", my mind started racing with understanding and all the implications of what He was showing me, "It makes You HUNGRY and You want to CONSUME OUR OFFERINGS!!"

I could feel Him smiling again. 

"And when we don't take time or consideration in preparing our offering...it's repulsive..." 

Immediately, I was contrite and hurt FOR Him for all the times I had ignored His leading and promptings...His principles and direction..and just thrown my offering on the altar...and, knowing Him like I do, He had longed to draw near to me, but the stench of what was burning on the altar kept Him at a distance...

Suddenly, all of the times that I could feel Him, but He felt distant made sense. Even though, maybe I had prepared my offering...maybe others had not..and vice versa. Maybe I had not and others had...

We dont realize how very connected we really are when it comes to corporate worship. When we gather corporately, its a collective offering that we offer...

I started crying. Not 'ugly' crying, but close...

I repented on my own behalf and on the behalf of my people.

Then the last part of what He showed me sunk in even more...How many PEOPLE have I...or we...repelled??

OH DEAR GOD! FORGIVE ME! FORGIVE US!

Believers! Followers of the Way! Worshipers! Worship Leaders! Most of us have heard and many of us already know that every decision we make affects more than just ourselves...but have we even considered our "preparation" as one of those decisions??

Have we even considered that the very thing that keeps the hurting, the skeptical, the angry, the sick, the needy, the lonely, the addicted, the depressed, the desperate, the WHOEVER away from the presence of God is the POOP in our offerings?? Not only is HE repulsed by the stench, but it repels the ones who need His presence the MOST! OH...

When we remove all the offal from our sacrifices...oh...the cloud...the freedom...the healing...the restoration...

That's it. 

No more poop for me.